It's a funny sounding title isn't it? But have you ever truly thought about the answer? Look at yourself and your life from somebody else's point of view. What does it look like?
When I look back and see myself and how proud of myself I was then thinking, "Oh look at me, I'm totally ahead of the game," and then see myself fall flat on my face and fail miserably, I want to laugh out loud. Who are you to think that you're so great? You're like no one. God must be laughing at me. He's so great, perfect, and has the power and ability to do anything- to execute it with perfection. And here I am, unable to do the smallest thing.
When I look back on the things that I've put a lot of emphasis on in this life: good grades, situations that I stressed out over, what I thought I was going to do with my life back then- it all seems so minuscule. Who cares about SATs anymore? They once had the power to half determine which college you got accepted into, if any, (and the younger ones will still freak out about them even now), but now that it's all over, and you've already got into college, graduated even, gotten a job, retired, or whatever, SATs seem really unimportant. And yet, the competition was so high, the stress so real-back then.
Sometimes I feel like my efforts are all for naught. I study so hard, I put in all my effort, and I get nothing. Why do I bother? On the other hand, there are people who study 10x as hard as I do, so who am I to complain? How do they do it?
I know, in my head, that if I "walk with God" then in the end it'll all turn out all right. No matter how many times I fall, it'll be Ok because in the end I will have won. But still, I want to just yell up there, "God, stop laughing at me and help me!" I get the point already. I can't do it, but I want to win; you can win can't you? Why won't you help me then? Why do you just watch me flail and flop around helplessly?
I think I ask Him at least every other day. I need an answer that's so clear it will punch me in the face. I'm pretty stupid so I might not see it otherwise.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
Attempt at Coastal Scents Order
So, I guess this is kind of a rant post. I'll make it short. Today I tried to order from Coastal Scents since I've been planning a spree since forever. I got an email saying that they were having their 25% off sale, so that got me really excited. Unfortunantly I'm about a year too late, and they hiked the free shipping up to $75 instead of the original $50. But a sale is better than no sale. So I go to put items in my cart, am annoyed by how every single time I put something in the cart, I'm taken to the cart, and have to refind my original shopping page over again, every single time.
But that's not the dealbreaker- even the exhorbant shipping wasn't (my shipping was calculated to be equivalent to half my purchase amount, woooow)- the dealbreaker was this: EVERY THING I WANTED TO BUY WAS SOLD OUT! How can this be? Seriously, you would think that such a big company would have the good sense to not be out of so many items at once during their discount times, or is that the point?
Basically, a planned $50 spree (not including shipping) was reduced to a mere $12 + $7 shipping. HOW LAME.
So I thought, if I order now, then do a second order later, wouldn't I just be blowing money away on shipping? The little discount I get here doesn't even cover it. Forget That.
Now onto more pleasant things:
I was also interested in their Undercover HD Foundation, despite the shameless plugs on Youtube by the two they sponsor. I mean, come on, at least try to sound a little less like an advertisement even if you are on, thought my ear was gonna fall off. From what I can tell I'm between the 04 and 05, really hard to tell which would be better. I liked how one of the girls showed each of the colors, it gives a slightly better idea than the website. Even better though would be if they swatched all the colors on a sheet of white paper and took a pic with a true to color camera. Seeing as how I don't have the $33 needed to buy both of them at the same time (nor the need- I only need a bit of foundation to cover forehead discolorations) I'll just wait until more reviews/ swatches come out to decide if it's even worth it.
I really do want to like Coastal Scents, despite the feelings that my posts give off, but so far, no dice. Maybe one day when I do successfully pull off a buy and receive my items, I'll be able to post about how much I love them or something.
But that's not the dealbreaker- even the exhorbant shipping wasn't (my shipping was calculated to be equivalent to half my purchase amount, woooow)- the dealbreaker was this: EVERY THING I WANTED TO BUY WAS SOLD OUT! How can this be? Seriously, you would think that such a big company would have the good sense to not be out of so many items at once during their discount times, or is that the point?
Basically, a planned $50 spree (not including shipping) was reduced to a mere $12 + $7 shipping. HOW LAME.
So I thought, if I order now, then do a second order later, wouldn't I just be blowing money away on shipping? The little discount I get here doesn't even cover it. Forget That.
Now onto more pleasant things:
I was also interested in their Undercover HD Foundation, despite the shameless plugs on Youtube by the two they sponsor. I mean, come on, at least try to sound a little less like an advertisement even if you are on, thought my ear was gonna fall off. From what I can tell I'm between the 04 and 05, really hard to tell which would be better. I liked how one of the girls showed each of the colors, it gives a slightly better idea than the website. Even better though would be if they swatched all the colors on a sheet of white paper and took a pic with a true to color camera. Seeing as how I don't have the $33 needed to buy both of them at the same time (nor the need- I only need a bit of foundation to cover forehead discolorations) I'll just wait until more reviews/ swatches come out to decide if it's even worth it.
I really do want to like Coastal Scents, despite the feelings that my posts give off, but so far, no dice. Maybe one day when I do successfully pull off a buy and receive my items, I'll be able to post about how much I love them or something.
Monday, November 09, 2009
Revlon Absolutely Fabulous Lipstick : #51 Infatuation
Usually I'm not one to review little "insignificant" things such as drugstore lipsticks- unless I really like it. This one I'm not particularly fond of, but I don't hate it either, so I just thought, what the heck.
The picture I have doesn't do it justice at all. Mostly due to the fact that I have no camera and took it with my phone instead. Edit: I actually took a couple more pics with another camera, it still doesn't do the lipstick justice, but what the heck. Go Here and scroll down.
According to the friend who gave it to me, (it came in a 2 pack and she wanted the other color), these are supposed to be high pigment lipsticks. I will agree with that, you don't need to slather on a bunch to get the color to show, just swipe on and Muah! The color is a bright warm red. Sometimes I look at it and think cool red, since the bright aspect throws me off. You wouldn't be able to tell from looking at the lipstick in the tube, it just looks red. When I mark a napkin, it looks like a true red. Make no mistake, this is a loud color, only to be worn by the non conservatives.
As far as comfort and moisture goes, it doesn't really feel like I'm wearing anything. But then again, I wear L'oreal Colorjuice every day of my life, so I may already be used to the weight. I find that it doesn't dry out my lips at all.
And Pic: Just wanted to note that, in real life it's a bit more intensely red- and not quite as bright.
I actually put a bit of gloss on before this photo.
I wasn't happy with the color, so I took another one with no gloss base. The actual color is actually somewhere between the two and WAY more intensely red. Unhelpful I know. I would say it looks more warm, but sometimes when I wipe it off, it shows pink on the napkin.
The picture I have doesn't do it justice at all. Mostly due to the fact that I have no camera and took it with my phone instead. Edit: I actually took a couple more pics with another camera, it still doesn't do the lipstick justice, but what the heck. Go Here and scroll down.
According to the friend who gave it to me, (it came in a 2 pack and she wanted the other color), these are supposed to be high pigment lipsticks. I will agree with that, you don't need to slather on a bunch to get the color to show, just swipe on and Muah! The color is a bright warm red. Sometimes I look at it and think cool red, since the bright aspect throws me off. You wouldn't be able to tell from looking at the lipstick in the tube, it just looks red. When I mark a napkin, it looks like a true red. Make no mistake, this is a loud color, only to be worn by the non conservatives.
As far as comfort and moisture goes, it doesn't really feel like I'm wearing anything. But then again, I wear L'oreal Colorjuice every day of my life, so I may already be used to the weight. I find that it doesn't dry out my lips at all.
And Pic: Just wanted to note that, in real life it's a bit more intensely red- and not quite as bright.
I actually put a bit of gloss on before this photo.
I wasn't happy with the color, so I took another one with no gloss base. The actual color is actually somewhere between the two and WAY more intensely red. Unhelpful I know. I would say it looks more warm, but sometimes when I wipe it off, it shows pink on the napkin.
Sunday, November 01, 2009
Nails: Gitter me Pretty
I came up with a random look using NYC nail polish that I just happened upon. It's gorgeous in real life and the pictures don't do it any justice. For a base (I found it didn't look good without one) I used an old Maybelline polish that I had- White a While from the Forever Strong line. It's like a shiny cream white. On top I put the NYC sparkle polish in Starry Silver Glitter. It's basically clear polish with lots of little silver glitter, and pink and blue glitter chunks.
Piercing Pagoda
So... after a time of long tumultuous debate, I finally decided on getting my cartilage pierced as my first piercing- ever. I chose Piercing Pagoda because, well, it seemed like they might have less cheap quality jewelry over Claire's. Maybe they're the same, I don't know, just the stigma. And for all you people who as soon as you read the title of this post are all going around screaming your heads off about how cartilages should be done with a needle- spare me. Sure, when people ask me, I tell them to go get it done with the needle, but come on, let's be honest. Some of us don't have that kind of money to spend.
So there I was kinda freaked out about all the pain I was hearing about. I decided on this earring that was $16/ pair. A thicker gold heart shaped one. Then the lady told me it was plated and asked if I had any allergies, so of course that freaked me out, and I ended up with the $34 14k one. I asked if I could buy a pair, and come back at a time of my choosing to get another piercing done, but they said no. I figured I'd ask anyways- never know. So thus I paid their little $2 extra fee for only buying one. I also didn't realize at the time that they charge an extra $2 to do cartilage. My total with tax was $22.50 @.@.
And onwards with the actual piercing. You sit in this chair with a light shining uncomfortably on you- it gets hot- I guess it's so they see better. When the lady first put the dot on, my initial reaction was IT'S WAY TOO LOW! So I had her move it up, and down, and up, and down again for about 10 times. When I said up or down i just meant a couple mm, but she would move it .5 cm. In the end I got so flustered that I just said ok because amidst it all I managed to get myself all confused and turned about X_X. The result- I think it ended up right where she suggested to me at first- way too low. I've gotten used to it now, but I think i'll want another one on top of it.
I had been staring at my ear so much when she was dotting it, that when she took the actual piercing thing to it, I felt a little prick (like someone poked you with a .7mm mechanical pencil) then in my head I could just see it- feel it- as it pushed through my ear. And then it was over. Not too much pain at all. For the next 30 min my ear was warm, and occasionally it would have a slight throbbing along with the once in a while tiny sting. Just enough to let you know it's there.
After that, nothing. Only when I actually touched it. It's since been two weeks, and I can touch my piercing without any pain, only when I move the stud funny does it hurt a little.
The one thing they don't do well is teach you how to clean it. It seems straightforward, but if you think about it, are you supposed to drizzle the cleaning solution on? or just simply swipe around the stud trying to get as much as you can? I've decided on a method in between. Load up the Qtip as much as you can, then swipe and try to squeeze out as much of the solution onto the ear. Some people say the cleaning solution isn't good and it'll cause irritation. I bought sea salt in case I needed to do soaks. But an acquaintance tested Claire's solution and said that the stuff's pretty good as far as antiseptics go. I figured I'd test it out on myself first, if I get irritated, then I'd switch. So far so good. No irritation, no bumps.
The staff at Piercing Pagoda are really nice. They're totally willing to help and assist to the best of their ability. They don't know everything, but what they do know, they try to help with. I'll definitely go back there for the other...6 piercings that I'm planning, even if their jewelry seems overpriced.
And pics:
THE BEFORE:
THE AFTER: I thought I imagined that my ear swelled, but from this picture I guess it was for real. It's since gone down though.
So there I was kinda freaked out about all the pain I was hearing about. I decided on this earring that was $16/ pair. A thicker gold heart shaped one. Then the lady told me it was plated and asked if I had any allergies, so of course that freaked me out, and I ended up with the $34 14k one. I asked if I could buy a pair, and come back at a time of my choosing to get another piercing done, but they said no. I figured I'd ask anyways- never know. So thus I paid their little $2 extra fee for only buying one. I also didn't realize at the time that they charge an extra $2 to do cartilage. My total with tax was $22.50 @.@.
And onwards with the actual piercing. You sit in this chair with a light shining uncomfortably on you- it gets hot- I guess it's so they see better. When the lady first put the dot on, my initial reaction was IT'S WAY TOO LOW! So I had her move it up, and down, and up, and down again for about 10 times. When I said up or down i just meant a couple mm, but she would move it .5 cm. In the end I got so flustered that I just said ok because amidst it all I managed to get myself all confused and turned about X_X. The result- I think it ended up right where she suggested to me at first- way too low. I've gotten used to it now, but I think i'll want another one on top of it.
I had been staring at my ear so much when she was dotting it, that when she took the actual piercing thing to it, I felt a little prick (like someone poked you with a .7mm mechanical pencil) then in my head I could just see it- feel it- as it pushed through my ear. And then it was over. Not too much pain at all. For the next 30 min my ear was warm, and occasionally it would have a slight throbbing along with the once in a while tiny sting. Just enough to let you know it's there.
After that, nothing. Only when I actually touched it. It's since been two weeks, and I can touch my piercing without any pain, only when I move the stud funny does it hurt a little.
The one thing they don't do well is teach you how to clean it. It seems straightforward, but if you think about it, are you supposed to drizzle the cleaning solution on? or just simply swipe around the stud trying to get as much as you can? I've decided on a method in between. Load up the Qtip as much as you can, then swipe and try to squeeze out as much of the solution onto the ear. Some people say the cleaning solution isn't good and it'll cause irritation. I bought sea salt in case I needed to do soaks. But an acquaintance tested Claire's solution and said that the stuff's pretty good as far as antiseptics go. I figured I'd test it out on myself first, if I get irritated, then I'd switch. So far so good. No irritation, no bumps.
The staff at Piercing Pagoda are really nice. They're totally willing to help and assist to the best of their ability. They don't know everything, but what they do know, they try to help with. I'll definitely go back there for the other...6 piercings that I'm planning, even if their jewelry seems overpriced.
And pics:
THE BEFORE:
THE AFTER: I thought I imagined that my ear swelled, but from this picture I guess it was for real. It's since gone down though.
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